The Passage
by nopplespitrol
Summary: Collection of Kikyo-centric stories. Now with added Naraku for a complete balanced angstfast.
1. Hades Autumn

The Passage: _The first shot has been fired…_ Hades Autumn

…

The mottled leaves had long past made their commutes to the ground. Ragged bristles attempted to clear up the traffic, but could only scrape off a paper-thin layer. Specs of leaves desperately clung to the sandaled stockings that shifted through them. But no matter how cruelly the broom swung, the leaves would never abandon their soggy little social.

"Foolish leaves…" a stern voice hissed, "what's the point of holding on?" she redoubled her efforts and rhythmically swayed back and forth to work through the matted plant material. After a minute or so, seeing that the leaves were too wet, miserable and stubborn to travel, she uttered a curse and headed towards a small and equally soggy-looking temple. She spied a corner and, after sweeping away the workings of some resident spiders, placed her rudimentary broom there. She stole one more frustrated glance at the fall foliage coating the temple path and said her words of compromise, "Fine, you all can rot together!"

There had been no major skirmishes in that immediate area for quite some time, and the temple's resident priestess was getting a bit aggravated. With no soldiers to treat or lives to save, she had more idle time than she could deal with. She admonished herself for sometimes wishing that there would be more war, but even the scraps of her former conscience realized that the dead ones were the lucky ones. Nothing was there to keep her busy; nothing was there to bury her thoughts in. Nothing wasn't really a helpful thing. So she spent her days tidying up, stocking up on herbs, and weaving bandages. During these tasks, her mind would meander through various memories, ponderings and daydreams. But all of these were undesirable and could only bring pain to her shattered soul. A serpentine beast emerged from the surrounding forest, leaving an ethereal glow in its wake. Its segmented arms clasped around fluorescent plasma. That was one thing that solitude rewarded her with. No reason to hide her true nature. No one was here to judge her wretched state. An existence that perverted every aspect that her religion taught. They couldn't see her, they couldn't fear her, they couldn't hate her. She let out a sigh. What would her teacher say to her if he saw her as such? She shook her head, no point in finding out. Those who trusted and guided her: all dead. Those who love her want her dead. Those who hate her: still alive and kicking quite hard. Another sigh. A slight breeze caught one final descending leaf off-guard and coaxed it to land in her hair. Her hand gently glided up and clasped the intruder. She brought down the straggler, and lowered it to the level of her eyes. Brown, brittle and long deceased, it looked like Death itself touched the leaf.

"Silly thing, you came long after your time ran out," the tip of her mouth twitched slightly, "now that you're not colorful or healthy, no one will glance down to look at you," the leaf vibrated with response, its cracked and rough edges picking up every little brush of wind. She continued, "Instead, they'll take you and burn you, because you're the one making their beautiful fall scenery ugly," her fingers snapped open, letting the leaf course through the air, a gust carried it and whisked it out of her line of sight. She stared intently, before turning and moving back towards her gathering, "Just look at you," she huffed, "talking to leaves!" she roughly plucked up a sprig of green. Luckily, this type of herb could be dried and used later. Many of the herbs she gathered would become useless a week after picking. _Such a waste. _ But she had to be prepared for everything, and that meant even stocking up on perishable things. Another one of her ghostly minions approached her and allowed its cargo to flow into the priestess. _Such a waste…_

A stinging sensation crept up through her upper body. She stood and twirled to the source of the disturbance.

"Naraku," she stated simply, as if she was naming the different types of herbs she had been collecting.

"Heh," he smirked, "Kikyo, you've been very quiet lately," she tipped her head sideways in response and raised an eyebrow,

"I didn't know my presence would be missed,"

"What are you planning to do?"

"Make you leave," she had no patience for this sort of thing today. She felt too drained. Too depressed. True, she wanted company, but _he_ was the only sentient being she never wished to see.

"Hmph. And here I was thinking you'd be a bit more hospitable," it was obvious he had no intention of leaving.

"Only mortals get that privilege," she explained, "so I'm not making any plans to be a good hostess to you," she seized her basket and started towards the temple grounds. She felt his aura following her, and it made her back itch, "Is there something else you wish to discuss, perhaps?" her head briefly swiveled to the side as she paced forward, but she refused to make eye contact.

"I actually came here to warn you,"

Now she was interested. She decided that the half-demon deserved a bit of attention and spun around, "What brought about this concern for my welfare, Naraku?" she smirked, "What kind of thing, besides yourself, would be out for my life?" his face remained blank. Not one iota of emotion.

The syllables of the name formed on his lips "Inuyasha," She let out an acute gasp. Judging by Naraku's surprised expression, Kikyo surmised that her countenance displayed a bit too much the emotional shock she felt burst inside of her. She quietly struggled to regain her composure before she spoke,

"So he wants to be rid of me, eh?" Kikyo tried her best to bridle her raging sensations before she completely made a fool of herself in front this monster, "Why tell me this, when Inuyasha might be able to destroy me once and for all?" Naraku had already switched back to that unnatural, placid face of his. What kind of sick game was that bastard playing with her?

"Do you really think I'd give that filthy animal the privilege of killing you?" his eyes burned with a certain sheen that she had never before seen in them, "Please, Kikyo, you really do underrate yourself. And of course, if you choose to fight back, I would take great pleasure in seeing you kill him again," That was it. Kikyo's hand reached into the basket, seized one of the rocks weighing down the contents and catapulted it at the half-demon. It shimmered with a terribly bright light as it rocketed forward. What was left of Naraku after impact was swept up into a cloud of his malice. Leaves swirled after him, as if they were giving chase in place of her. His cool, collected voice rang out after him:

"I'll be looking forward to this evening's entertainment…"

"Bastard…" she stammered out, no longer able to reign in her frustration. At least he was gone. _A small victory._ But a victory nonetheless.

The sun had moved down past the top beam of the Shinto gate at the entrance to the temple, signifying that evening had officially arrived. The wind had betrayed its normal daily patterns by remaining dormant for the dusking hours. Liquid clouds frothed over the saffron sky. The trees had abandoned their leaves completely and their branches stood still, as if they were trapped in some petrified world. Straggling birds rushed to reach their respective nests before their guiding light became dimmer. The weak sun struggled to warm Kikyo's sham body, but its energy was siphoned away by the surrounding network of barren twigs. Her uniform draped limply around her limbs as she knelt in prayer. The small stone icon before her, eroded by rainy and windy evenings unlike the current one, was dedicated to a minor goddess. The effigy's abstract and feminine curves remained intact, but any semblance of emotion had long gone from its oval face. Whoever had looked after this shrine prior to Kikyo had obviously not cared for the patron goddess of widows. Her lips made minute movements as whispering air rushed through them. Prayer beads rattled in her hands, swaying with every little trembling motion her arms made. An apologetic offering was laid at the foot of the statue. For many still and lonely moments she uttered silent respects. An unusual, chilling gust caused her head to perk up, and sent shivers coursing through her. With the advent of the wind came a familiar presence, the one that she wished not to come. She raised her torso and the rest of her body gracefully followed suit. She stood there and addressed the intruder:

"It's rude to interrupt another's prayer," her hands clenched around the beads tightly, "one could be punished by the gods," in one fluid motion she whirled around and faced the arrival.

"Kikyo…" the only word that escaped from the youth's mouth. His eyes drove themselves into the shrine maiden's. His gaze quickly averted when he recognized the subdued hellfire in hers.

"What is it? Why aren't you with your companions?" her hand reached for the bow she had been carefully propped against a tree. _"Just in case,"_ she told herself when she had decided to go out and pray. To pray that she didn't need its use. The air was still again, but the winnowed branches still reverberated from the last gust. Small rustles emitted from the fallen leaves as unfortunate twigs struck them. Larger crackles could be heard as uncovered feet sifted through the dead layers. Kikyo quietly noted his approach, his guilty face, and his sword slowly sliding out of its sheath.

"I-I can't let this continue…" he stammered, "you're suffering," his blade fully emerged, transformed by mystical energies. He let it sink to the ground for a moment as he stole another glance at the woman in front of him. The hellfire had no reason to hide anymore.

"So you've come to end it?" her eyes reflecting her injured and searing soul. _Looks like Naraku will get the show he wanted._ The rest of her face remained still, no iota of surprise, no ounce of sorrow or hurt, just the hatred in those steel eyes. Her hand reached back behind her and brought forth a feathery arrow. The willow bow shot up to greet the arrow and the two merged to become one purpose, "I didn't know that was your decision to make," the fire of her eyes intensified to a raging vision of inferno, "tell me, Inuyasha, what do you do with a dead leaf?" her head tipped up to invite an answer, a tense noise quietly sounded from her strained longbow.

"What do you mean by that?" he stepped back, "That's not the sort of—,"

"Tell me, Inuyasha!" she demanded her voice roared forth, a tempest of rage. A crimson sun began to settle behind her, obscured by dead, spidery pillars.

He saw the seriousness, and it invoked him to respond, "You get rid of it," he said, still confused by the question. He tried to recall his purpose for coming. The mission he had so clearly formed was being warped and malformed in this hellish place. Jagged, burning streaks spanned across the sky, lit by the demonic star growing on the horizon. The ground glowed with yellow and orange daggers he could have sworn that were embers. A demoness, with her bow tightly drawn, faced him. Hate poured out from her features. Skeletal fingers gripped at the worn tape on the wood of the weapon, unnatural tears flowed down from her searing eyes. He had to slay this frightful thing, this ruined thing, this inconvenient thing. It was sullying his newfound life, making it ugly. Kikyo stared back at him, who was he to decide her life? It may be miserable, but it was hers, and hers alone. It suddenly dawned on her that she was free to love, free to hate, free to live as she saw fit. Finally released from earthly burdens. Free of _this burden. I shall take no judgment from anyone but myself. I don't care if I make your life ugly. I don't need your pity. I don't need you. I'm free… _ And in the final deciding moment, she realized what had to be done. Inuyasha raised his blade and faced her. As he began to swing it, he heard this response:

"No, you let it go,"

A/N: Ku ku ku…everyone's so mean to Kikyo-ku. But she's such an uberpnzers character. Anyone who abuses her should be tossed into a pit of trial lawyers. And I haven't given up on the "Isle" I'm just looking for the storyboard for it and I have most of chapter two written and ready for packaging (told ya I was a slow writer). Jup. I'll probably install more little short stories with minimal correlation to this one, so keep your eyes peeled (not literally 0.0) for updates.

…

Valete, mi columbae!

** 'glomps Kikyo and gets slapped'**

Excuse the confusing phrasing, one must do her best when dealing with keyboard ninjas. Hijah! carroty chop Mmmm...carrots.

**I don't know a thing 'bout Shinto. So don't sue me, sue the corporations. :3**

**bys da way… im no owning inuyasha, me 2 poor from lawsuits… GIANT SQUID!!!!**


	2. Static

-1Transcript two: Static

The cold, still air was suddenly disturbed as the shabby train bolted through it. One of its front lights was shattered and there were pieces of shrapnel peeling off of its questionably safe passenger cars. Near the end of this strange self-propelling caravan was a car that was in slightly better shape then the rest of its comrades. Inside lay various sets of seats in various colors and states. The occupants were few and scattered about the car, trying to avoid one another for reasons as varied as the chairs they sat in. In the front seat sat a man with lines on his face as obvious as his anxiety, a dilapidated leather suitcase was resting in his lap. Three seats behind him and stretching across the row was a family of five, who were all more grave and silent than the chilly atmosphere around them. The last occupant positioned herself in the very last of the chairs; she was a young woman in a habit, her eyes were closed, her hands clutched around rosary beads and her mouth busy with prayer. One of the children in the family glanced back curiously at her, still too young to realize how rude it was to stare. The girl's eyes dutifully watched the prayer beads sway back and forth with the rhythmical rocking of the train car. Finally, her inquisitive nature grew too powerful to remain silent, she slid over to her ragged mother and began to whisper, "Mother, why is that lady dressed strangely? Is she from far away?"

Her mother replied straightly, "No, my child, she is a Catholic Sister. Our government has just recently allowed them to practice their religion openly,"

"What's a Catholic?" the girl replied innocently.

Her mother smiled on the outside, but the realization of how nearly half a century of "reeducation" had wiped out most of the traces of faith among the youth made her uneasy, "It's like the church we go to now, Miri, only they believe in a few different things than us,"

"But church is so boring, why would she want to go back to it?" the child rolled her eyes and moved back to her seat.

"Because, Miri," the woman started but stopped, knowing the child would learn as she got older; the mother now turned her attention to the nun sitting in the rear of the train. She smiled as the sister continued to recite her prayers in a rote fashion. "Well," she said to herself, "maybe the faith isn't lost to all of the youth,"

The nun soon finished up her rosary and opened her eyes. Prayer was an excellent way to spend a trip as long as this, especially since the very nature of her destination was religious. She had been stranded in Russia when the initial revolts had begun, and her exile had lasted more than fifty years in this wretchedly frigid wasteland. She was eager to come back to her convent in northern Italy, where the warm breezes and lush green fields and farms made for a most relaxing and pacifying atmosphere. She glanced out of the window at the bleak blackness of the wilderness that seemingly stretched out to infinity. She brushed a stray lock of hair out of her eyes wearily, feeling strangely akin to this terrible abyss. She whispered in a voice softer than the rustling cloth of her habit, "Strange how you and I were so alike in the end," her thoughts drifting back to people long passed and buried in the sands of time. Smiling softly, she straightened out her posture as she spotted the distant lights of an approaching train station. Breaks squealed in protest as they were tortured over the cold, slippery rails. Steam blasted out into the bitter night as the train strained to eliminate unwanted momentum. After a minute or so of this dangerous dance on the metal beams, the locomotive came to a complete halt. Hisses of more steam emitted as the doors slowly began opening their frozen mouths. The sister gracefully raised herself up and meekly made her way towards the exit. She hopped out of the coach, a bit wary of the steps attached to it.

She glanced around and began heading towards the exit until someone grabbed her shoulder and addressed her in Japanese, "Sister Kikyo, I presume?"

She shrugged the hand off and turned to greet the man behind her, her accent changing to match "Yes, I am she, how may I help you, sir?"

He chuckled and began again, "No need to call me 'sir', I'm not that old yet. Please just call me 'Hiro'. In any case my research team is in dire need of your services and talents, would you be willing to help us?"

"I am unaware that I have talents of interest to you," she replied flatly.

"Please, sister, you cannot hide anything from us, we know quite a bit about your extraordinary powers. We need them to uncover what may be the most amazing discovery of the century," he stared doggedly into Kikyo's eyes and continued, "we may have found a life form half a millennium old under the Sea of Japan,"

Kikyo's eyes widened slightly, "What sort of life form?" she already knew the answer.

"We don't know, that's where you come in," Hiro explained

"How would I be of any service to you?" she was getting rather irritated, either at this man's persistence, or her blatant lying, "I don't have any expertise in that sort of field,"

Hiro leaned in closer after looking around him, "We think it may have mythical origins,"

"That's insane!" Kikyo harshly whispered, "You should never take those stories seriously,"

"I didn't before, but after this find and the trouble we've been having with it, I've begun to think there's more to those silly tales," he gave her an knowing look before speaking again, "and I happen to know that you are living proof of those stories as well,"

Kikyo gave a small huff and rolled her eyes, "Fine, I'll help you, but you must never bother me again after this, understand?"

"I understand perfectly," he smiled and extended his arm towards a barely-lit exit sign, "come, we have transportation already prepared for you,"

………………………………...

Kikyo never liked planes, and she always wondered why people would ride these noisy machines in order to save time. Sure, she had all of the time in the world to spare and more, but that sort of lifespan had its downsides, too. Such as attracting the attention of certain determined researchers. The plane was some sort of special model she judged, designed to land in the water. She didn't like it all the same, though, and wished to be off of it as soon as possible. Mr. Hiro, as she now addressed him, tapped her on the shoulder and pointed over to a conglomeration of ships and other crafts dotting the surface of the water, "There's our site, we'll be landing shortly. _Good,_ Kikyo thought _here comes what may be the most annoying moment I'll live in my life._ After a somewhat shaky landing, Mr. Hiro escorted her onto a flimsy yellow raft, "It's not much, I know, but we're a little tight on funds right now," he apologized. After a foamy, fun-filled toss in the waves, the landing crew and passengers were safely aboard one of the larger research ships in the fleet. Kikyo couldn't resist smiling at the name of the ship, the _Spider_, but she quickly regained her stoic composure. Hiro started briefing her, "Okay, we've managed to bring this container to the surface, but our teams are unable to enter due to some sort of poisonous energy permeating the interior,"

"And I'm needed to purify it and make it safe to enter?"

"Exactly," Hiro then motioned for Kikyo to follow him. He gestured towards a huge, wooden cube, which dripped with a sort of diluted purple ooze. It was suspended about a foot above the ship's floor by a team of two cranes. Suits used to clean up chemical messes were hung on a rope next to it, obviously tried, but found useless. Kikyo sighed and turned to Hiro.

"Shall I go in now?"

"By all means," Hiro had a sort of hopeful and desperate look on his face. Kikyo knew she would succeed, but she kept that sentiment to herself. Clutching her rosary, she slid the door leading into the container away with relative ease and braced herself. _I'd never thought I would have to deal with this again…_

A blast of warm moist air greeted her, it smelled of a noxious cocktail of chemicals and poison. She felt the evil occupying this shabby container staring at her. She gripped tightly on to her beads and said aloud, "Even after all of this time, you still haven't learned to behave yourself,"

"Who are you?" a deep voice stammered.

"Don't tell me five hundred years in confinement has stolen your confidence, Naraku," she smiled slightly.

"You're such a bitch, Kikyo," his voice regained strength.

"Humph," she snorted, "If you hadn't been so naughty, I would not have had put you in this prison to begin with,"

"You could at least address me with more respect, I haven't lost any of my power in this wretched place,"

"You always were a proud one, but I'm not here to torment you," she explained coolly.

"Really, why else would you come here?" he teased.

She pointed her thumb at the exit, "You get the privilege of being a scientific discovery," she smiled, "and I think they'll have a whole bunch of fun tormenting you for me,"

"Bitch,"

"Monster,"

"AMAZING!"

Naraku looked up from the corner he was sitting in to see that Hiro had invaded his private space with a whole team of scientists. He turned to Kikyo and saw her slight grin, "Heh, how things have changed, Kikyo, now you're the one getting others to do your dirty work,"

"And you're the victim this time," she curtly shot back, "think of this as my little gift of revenge," she walked out, feeling as much guilt as her religious affiliation required her to. She could hear his curses and shouts as the research team tried to subdue him. They would find it an easy task, she had already cast a weakening spell on him. He didn't even notice it being applied to him. _He's definitely softened up in there._

………………………….

The research lab was so clean and sterile that Kikyo felt as if she had to go to confession in order to be granted entrance. White walls, glistening surfaces, and squeaky clean tiling nearly blinded her as she entered. Mr. Hiro had given her an address and room number to report to right after they had contained their latest "find". _I thought I was all done with this business!_ Apparently they had overheard her little chat with the estranged half-demon, and the excavators were all eager to learn what sort of connection she had with Naraku. _Serves me right for gloating. I suppose I should have been nicer to him after trapping him there for so long. _She shook her head, what would Mother Martha have said about her behavior there? Guilt crept up her spine again as she thought of what kind of tests they must be administering to Naraku. Kikyo let out a deep sigh and tried to calm down. _He's probably just mad as hell at me now. No reason to be worried about his welfare. _Indeed she found this concern for him rather strange, about a day ago she hadn't even allowed him the privilege of her pity. Soon Mr. Hiro entered, flanked by two of his assistants. One was a tall, sullen male; the other a stout vivacious woman. Mr. Hiro greeted Kikyo with the utmost enthusiasm:

"Sister Kikyo, I'm delighted to tell you that our research on our latest find is going splendidly!"

"That's wonderful," Kikyo returned softly. Mr. Hiro, seeing that Kikyo was not intent on giving him any more congratulations, took his cue to speak again:

"I'm most interested in your relation to this…" he hesitated, trying to find the right words, "…fellow,"

"Hm, yes," Kikyo smiled slightly, "I should have warned you ahead of time of our most…cordial acquaintance," so much for the eighth commandment, but if Naraku didn't follow them, neither would Kikyo for the time being.

"We've arranged a room so that you and he will be able to speak at ease,"

"I appreciate that," Kikyo had now listed five things to say in confession, most of them dishonest in nature; she decided Naraku's reappearance was having a most negative influence upon her, and that science was her least favorite subject.

………………………………...

When she caught sight of the room in which she was so joyously to be united with her dear friend, she could not help but gaze in amazement at all of the precautions being taken to secure it. She inquired why it must be so guarded and sealed, Mr. Hiro shook his head and said, "With all of the trouble and illness he's caused, we want to take no chances," he glanced away from the monitoring system outside the door to the room and up at Kikyo, "we're not all impervious to the mystic forces of a demon,"

Kikyo chuckled and said no more. Mr. Hiro typed a few keys, and with an affirmative mechanical squeal they opened. The interior of this little cubical the bane of her existence now occupied was painfully barren and utilitarian. She grinned inwardly at the sight of Naraku sitting at the other end of a plain white table like some sort of prison convict. Kikyo had once worked in a ministry for the incarcerated, and it gave her some amusement to see him resemble them so uncannily. The researchers had dressed him in a sort of tacky variation of hospital scrubs and had sheared off the majority of the length of his hair, leaving his with a sort of curly mop on the top of his head. She couldn't refrain from commenting on this situation, not even for all of her years as a respected sister at St. Paul's.

"Naraku, you look like you've just come from the sick ward,"

"If I knew what a 'sick ward' was, I'd perhaps understand the content of that jab. I shall assume for your sake that it was most likely not constructive in nature,"

She laughed lightly, but before she could respond she was interrupted again by her companion, "I hate it when you laugh like that,"

"What?" she huffed, "Since the great and mighty Naraku has arrived, Kikyo may not enjoy herself anymore? She must be miserable once again?" she laughed again, in a shrill mocking tone, just to spite _him_.

"Exactly, we can't have Kikyo going around and having fun. That's just against all that nature intended for our dear Kikyo," he spit back, equally mocking in his tone.

"Believe it or not, my most impatient friend, five hundred years really have changed the world," Kikyo's voice resumed its normal gravity, "and me," she added.

"Really?" he raised an eyebrow of feigned interest, "and here I was thinking our Kikyo was intent on being the savior of mankind from the unmentionable terrors of the demonic wilderness for the rest of her life,"

"I ran out of demons," she replied flatly, "unless you'd like to be the first of my post-retirement achievements,"

He changed the subject quickly, "Is what you're wearing the uniform for you mikos in this age?" he slightly extended a finger in recognition of her habit.

"No," she answered, "like I said, times change and so do people," she brushed her usual stray lock of hair out of her face, "I have been blessed with a larger opportunity to change than most people,"

"Blessed you say? I thought you hated your existence,"

"I hated it merely for the reasons I thought myself to exist for. It took me awhile to realize that I could have genuinely good reasons for existing, and this new outfit that you're interested in happened to come with that understanding,"

"You're no longer a miko? Then what are you?"

"I am a bride of Christ," she stopped, not feeling up to explaining this, even though she knew Naraku would inquire further, either out of curiosity or jealousy. _He couldn't be jealous_ she corrected herself _he probably hates me for locking him up like that. _

"And who is this Christ fellow who has so enamored you? And here I thought our dear Kikyo would never look at another man for the rest of her life," he teased.

Kikyo couldn't help but let out a short bout of giggling; in spite of being ignorant on the subject, he still insisted on commenting on it in an attempt to vex her. _If he keeps referring to me as "our dear Kikyo" I'm going to keep laughing._

"I told you to quit that laughing," the amount of annoyance in his eyes became quite evident each second Kikyo had decided to spend chuckling at his silly remark. She quickly realized that her advantage was an unfair one in this conversation and thus decided to enlighten him.

"It's a term in the religion I follow now--Christianity--for a woman who joins a religious order such as mine. We revoke all earthly things, including marriage, and devote ourselves to his teachings,"

"You still haven't answered my question," he replied coldly.

"Christ…well," she paused for a moment, "he can't be summed up in words, really, it's difficult to explain…"

"And here you were defending yourself so eloquently a minute ago; and now the great Kikyo is at a loss of words to respond to one simple question? Who is he?" his eyes stared doggedly at Kikyo, not willing to give up chase. Kikyo sensed a bit of resentment in his words as he jested.

She turned her head to the ceiling when she began "He's the greatest man--and God-- to ever live, die…" she glanced at Naraku's face and felt slightly disgusted when his features showed relief, "…and come back to life,"

"Well, that's certainly quite a compliment coming from someone who has also come back, isn't it, Kikyo?" he was smirking.

"Heh, but you don't need to worry about him for the time being, I doubt you'd have any interest in a religion such as this," she was now looking at him, wishing she could totally believe those words. The same question kept popping back into her mind _could he have changed at all? _ But some things never go away, she had not failed to pick up his jealousy, a common tool utilized in her suffering. _Jesus! Of all people, Naraku, only you would have the guts…_ she didn't want to think any more on the subject when a distant memory surfaced of her being ripped apart by terrible claws. Unconsciously, she put a hand to area where the injury had once been. It took years of prayer and meditation to put the past behind her, she wasn't going to let this wretch open up old wounds!

Naraku hadn't failed to notice the sudden jolt in Kikyo's expression, his eyes narrowed and his voice came out softer than before, "It seems time has not altered you at all, Kikyo,"

……………………………….

She stared at her reflection in the mirror, for once she wasn't wearing her habit, but the clothes the laboratory had provided her. Her hand drifted towards her face, but when she realized that there was no strand to push away, snapped it back to her lap. "Mr. Hiro" had breached their agreement far too many times for her comfort. He insisted that she stay there and assist in "research". She was so sick of all this! Her carefully built world crumbled more and more each day as she had to face that monster in conversation, but the tougher battle was with the painful memories arising in her every passing moment she spent here.

"Inuyasha…" the word slid off her tongue, but she decided that the breathy sound of the name did not please her at all. Had she loved him once? Her brow twitched in confusion. How could she remember Naraku much more easily than the one who claimed to love her so long ago? _Simple, Naraku's more interesting._ She pushed down that thought as fast as it had come up. This was time for meditation on Inuyasha, by God, she wasn't going to let Naraku dominate her imagination, too! She tried to recall physical traits, she remembered…ears…cute dog's ear on top of his head, and talons on his hands…_the ones that tore you apart_. No! That wasn't him…she strained to clear her head…it couldn't have been, "God, it's been too long…" she gasped, "I feel so old…" she laughed at herself for making such a silly statement. All she knew was Naraku was a manipulative monster and that Inuyasha was--what was he again? She tried to concentrate on the subject, but it always seemed that her access to that information was limited. _Maybe I shouldn't try to remember it. _She felt a sort of dark feeling when she prodded her relationship with this Inuyasha. As if she had repressed them. _Well, years of prayer and study have been most effective in getting rid of unwanted things._

While Kikyo would have wished for a few more moments of solitude, her desires were ultimately defeated by the ambitions of Mr. Hiro. Three swift knocks rocketed Kikyo out of her trance and into the place called reality. She let out a startled "yes?" and turned towards the door.

Hiro paced in hurriedly, panic all over his features, in a wheezing voice he managed to say, "The s-subject…" he coughed, "it's…it has," Kikyo was now out of her chair facing him, her face radiating with concern.

"Mr. Hiro, you are unwell," she led him to a chair in the room, "please sit and rest."

"K-Kikyo," he inhaled sharply, "don't waste your time…he--it has,"

"Mr. Hiro, please don't push yourself, you must rest,"

Hiro grabbed Kikyo by the collar, and in a exasperated manner began to say, "The subject has escaped! You've got to go stop him! You're the only one who can!" he suddenly let out a gasp, rolled back his eyes and fell to the floor.

Kikyo had felt the man's soul escape from his body before he even reached the floor. An obvious victim of poisoning. _Naraku…._ he had crossed the final line of her patience. With a determination more dogged than any she had ever summoned before, she strode over to her hand bag and quickly shot a hand into it. Seconds later, that very hand produced a gun. Kikyo never ever believed in violence. She preferred having the aggressive initiative.

………………………..

The normally well-kept lab was not in its usual humor today, Kikyo quickly noted. As Kikyo gingerly stepped over the broken test tubes, she said a brief prayer for all souls, as well as Mr. Hiro's, that had departed on this day. Her hand clenched the gun possessively as she made her way around a particularly obtrusive filing cabinet. Leave it to Naraku to wreak havoc in any situation. _It's all my fault. I should have warned them about him. I shouldn't have assumed he'd change over time. My fault my fault my…_A flurry of sparks from the exposed power grid interrupted her self-castigation. Her mind newly focused on her original intention. She needed to kill the beast, otherwise he would escape into a world much more susceptible to his malice. As she approached the hallway, Kikyo found it to be too quiet to be natural. Reaching out with her spiritual senses, she tried to locate the monster. Something akin to TV static prevented her from finding out Naraku's whereabouts.

"Of all times to get a poor signal…" she sighed, realizing that this hunt would not be an easy one.

"You've become careless, Kikyo,"

The addressed slowly turned around to meet her prey, feeling a lot less like the predator. Her eyes were the last part to give attention. And when they did, she wished she was blind. Covered from head-to-toe in the blood of the researchers he had slain, Naraku glared down at her. In his left hand he carried what resembled a map of the building, although with all the bloodstains on it, Kikyo couldn't tell for certain. The beguiled sister hadn't seen anything so gruesome since…_I last locked this bastard up._ At this moment, all her initial objectives seemed to melt away. When she summoned enough composure to look Naraku straight in the eye, she faintly began to say her response:

"I should have known you'd remain the same abomination after all this time…" she let out a shuddering breath as she spotted a decapitated body near Naraku's feet.

He veered from the subject she had started, "I knew you would come, Kikyo. I sent that detestable man to go and fetch you."

"You wanted to trap me, eh?" she smiled darkly, and tried to erase the worry that shone in her eyes.

"Does it remind you of the time I drew you to Mt. Hakurei?" his eyes lit up as if remembering something delightful. Well, delightful to him, at least.

Kikyo furrowed her brow at this statement, "Where?" was the question that popped out after a few moments of uncomfortable silence.

"Don't you remember?"

"Well…" she scratched the back of her head for a moment, "could you refresh my memory a bit?"

His face dropped in exasperation, "You mean you've forgotten all about that?" Kikyo swore she saw a faint bit of sadness in his expression.

"What's wrong, Naraku, angry that my thoughts no longer devote themselves to you?"

He snapped at this question, "And what if I am? What if my thoughts were solely concerned with you for all this time?" he moved forward faster than eyesight could compensate. She tried to step back but a hand reached out and latched onto her shoulder, holding her fast, "All I could think about in that prison you put me in was how to pay you back. It consumed me," his eyes radiated anger and another unreadable emotion.

"Let me go, Naraku," Kikyo slowly raised her pistol, "or I won't be nice when dealing with you this time,"

"Finally given up archery, Kikyo?"

"Trust me, this is better than any bow you'll ever see," the tip of the short barrel began to glow slightly, "this new technology was the reason the rest of your vile kind went extinct,"

"Kikyo…"

"I don't know why I even agreed to let you out," her eyes glazed slightly with anger, "I should have just killed you there,"

"Why didn't you, then?" his eyes enigmatic as ever.

She stared back intently for a moment. Why hadn't she? Why had she spared him in the first place? She didn't like being this calm in a situation like this. Kikyo needed to get out before she realized something terrible about herself, "I thought you'd take it with better humor and behave yourself this time," she toted her gun confidently, but she just didn't feel like firing. Naraku's tepid expression certainly proved he knew she was hesitant in her execution. _Perhaps because it's against my religion to kill another sentient being, human or otherwise…_ This excuse, she decided, sufficed for now. This indescribable feeling she held was becoming irritating; she didn't want to find out the real reason behind her reluctance

Her mind was a floodgate, on the verge of bursting and letting out all the demons of the past. No matter how many times she went to confession and took the Eucharist, they couldn't be exorcised. No matter how strong her spiritual powers or holy energies were, they still survived, and bided their time. _Somehow, in those times I knew this would come back and bite me…_

_"Heh, Kikyo, you're too kind for your own good, you know," with that said, Kikyo's attention returned immediately to the despicable villain in front of her, "you insist on helping and forgiving others, and in the end they take advantage and walk over you," _

"Most are thankful and do no harm," she sighed, "but I suppose there are exceptions," Mr. Hiro's eager face flashed in her mind; followed by a man from an era past, clothed in elaborate embroidery, flute on his lips; a girl, her hair tied up tightly with a doll hanging out of her hand; a boy with canine features and ears of a hound, blood on his claws; and a cave…

"Face it Kikyo, you're never going to be happy like that," he grinned wickedly, like the time he killed her. And she had complied…

_"NO!" _She screamed and covered her head, gun dropping to the ground, causing waves to disturb a puddle of blood. Kikyo saw gray, the whole area was a oppressive gray, a world were light had to be artificially introduced. Sharp breaths broke the uncomfortable silence settling in this two dimensional world, the one she constructed after the one she previously lived in shattered. Her dark tormentor towered over her, his face completely obscured by the makeshift lighting.

"You've always lived a lie, haven't you, Kikyo?" she saw that smile again, those garishly white teeth glinting in the shadow. Like a wolf's, ready to tear apart a meal, "you're no better than the people I used as puppets, only I suppose you let just anyone be your puppeteer,"

Her lips trembled, she wasn't living a lie, that would be breaking some rule. She already had forgotten which one. _Thou shalt not…_ Knees buckled and joined the discarded weapon on the ground, the blood slowly seeping up the fabric of the skirt she wore, "I-I'm not," she tried to raise her head, but couldn't find the strength to do so. The weight of countless memories started to strain her neck, "I was never…I thought I'd be…I…," _…bear false witness…_ a hand raised her head up, Kikyo then realized she had been crying, when she saw his blurred visage.

"Think of it, Kikyo," this terrible swatch continued, "when have you ever been able to act freely, when has anyone ever allowed you to do what you wanted, instead doing of what you needed?" her focus got better as the saline drained from the pools on her lenses, his crimson gaze fixed onto hers. She never recalled him smiling this much. Then again, she had never seen him particularly happy, either. They had been enemies once, right? _…against thy neighbor…_ This was why he brought such terrible memories back to hurt her, right? Her time capsule mind suddenly exploded into a thousand different eons, each of which Kikyo had locked away with one method of training or another. In order to fulfill her duty at the time.

"Please, go away, I'm not ready yet," she sobbed out, not knowing half what she said, "my teacher says I'll be able to fight demons in a few years, that I'll be able to protect everyone with my powers," her hands were stained red, like her hakama. "Someday I'll be able to help everyone, I'm so happy," she didn't know she was smiling, coated with the death of others, watched by her antithesis. Her hands turned upwards, glistening in the manufactured twilight. The lovely paint on her hands suddenly held a completely new meaning for her. She raised an arm to her chest, and pain cascaded across her face, she glanced upwards and shrieked, "CURSE YOU! I TRUSTED YOU!" only the man wore a strange suit of demonic cloth, the color of her hands, and his head was donned with silver hair. But that same wolf's mouth was grinning at her, forcing her to look at it. And suddenly the façade her memories had produced collapsed, flinging her back into reality. _Why, why, why, why…,"_It was you…" she barely whispered, "you stole my world…" she choked, not used to the sensation of weeping, "you ruined my life…" despite being held up by his hand, her head sunk lower, trying to avoid his gaze, "you killed me…and I was…,"

"Kikyo, was that really a life?" there it was again, Kikyo could feel the bared teeth, mocking her, ready to devour her, "I freed you, and I believe you even admitted it,"

"I was lying!" her head lashed up in a sudden whirl of rage, "I just wanted to use you, pathetic wretch!" There was no way Kikyo could owe this monster anything. She tried to scoot back, but his hand latched onto her arm.

"Now Kikyo…" he breathed, "you could have played into my hands back then,"

"I-I couldn't have," she was wavering again, she hated the control he had over her, "the Shikon Jewel would have been…"

"It was your duty again, Kikyo. Your whole life was nothing but duty, and in the end it was the death of you," no grin, no hint of contempt in his voice, "I thought better of you back then, that'd you'd do something selfish for once…" his eyes narrowed, "but you proved to be the ever-obedient twit in the end, didn't you?"

"I didn't want to live…not just for earthly obligations…" she could feel another tide of emotions coming, these were different, somehow they calmed her, but at the same time, frightened her. _Forbidden. Verboten. Inconcessa. This isn't for me…I couldn't possibly have this…_

"You chased after a mutt you thought you loved," the expression on his face became totally clear: it was disgust, "you could have lived freely if you'd only have wished on the jewel,"

"No I couldn't have, I could never have…" she admitted to the fact that as a mortal woman she was invariably trapped. It didn't matter who her captor was then, whether it be duty, jewel, half-breed…_fate, "_You would have killed me, or taken me or whatever was running through your mind then…"

"True…" he mused, "but then again, I was trapped in that cave, and I managed to find a way out, didn't I? Unfortunately I became ensnared by a human heart soon afterwards…"

"Heh…" she coughed, "and I always reminded you of that back then," she sighed, remembering even more of the interactions with her nemesis, "I suppose we aren't too different, you and I,"

"I'll agree with that --in the greater scheme of things-- but unlike you, I never accepted my present conditions in life,"

"Greed," she corrected him, "was your undoing,"

"Diligence was yours,"

"I always got satisfaction from that, unlike you," she relaxed a bit, despite being in the magnitude of danger she was.

"Hmph," he grunted, "you didn't seem to like it,"

"So you'll admit you never were happy, living on the miseries of other, like you did?"

"I'll admit that if you'll promise me to stop living so damn perfectly,"

She gasped at this, "What? You're going to let me live, then, Naraku? I could think of a time before this that you'd sell what was left of your soul to have me in such a vulnerable position," her confidence began to mask her anxiety, a common technique she used. _About 500 years ago, that is._

"That was then, Kikyo…years of solitude change a man," and without warning he pulled her into an embrace, his hands trembled ever-so-slightly as they wrapped around her frame, she could feel his uneven breathing on her neck, he spoke no more after that.

"Naraku?" he answered by tightening his hold on her, and resting his head on her shoulder. They looked like some sort of gothic fairy tale, embracing in the blood as they were… _Why, why, why… _He was trapping her, like everyone else, but she could not hate him for it… and then Kikyo knew what she felt. _Pity. _For all her hatred, she couldn't help but pity this creature that lived by desires determined by someone else, and operated on a heart that was not its own. Equally encased as she, living life out by a track fate had set, riding the same shabby train to the limitless horizon. Her hands found the courage to slide up his sides and return his gesture. She would extend her forgiveness for now, but she didn't know how long it'd last. _You and I were destined to fight all our lives, to dance the dark dance that dictates the good and evil in this world. We are nothing but the faces of the forces that compel us, no matter how we struggle, we'll fall into this web of destiny again and again…, _"You know as well as I that we never could be free, both of our lives are lies, as were the lives of the ones who inhabited the cursed Jewel,"

"…that was then," he finally answered, "the Jewel is gone, we're no longer controlled by it," he was on the point of crushing her, so desperately was he clutching her.

"It's not just the Jewel, you know it as well as I," she put a hand to his remaining hair and began to run her fingers through it, "our fates are as such, Naraku. And they'll remain as such for as long as we live,"

"You're a fool to believe in fate, Kikyo," his voice softened by the fabric of her sweater.

"And you're the fool for ignoring it," she returned curtly. _This punishment I'm receiving is because I ignored it, too. _She attempted to push herself away after a moment, but found much resistance in doing so, "Let me go, Naraku," no answer. Her fingertips glowed with a soft light as she pressed them against his chest, without warning, almost electrical surges of holy energy emitted from them. The monster recoiled, and before he could seize his prize again, she had disappeared into the dusky depths of the building. He could not sense her, the woman had gone and hidden herself from him. _Again._

"Kikyo…" he smiled slightly, "you haven't changed a bit…"

///////////////////////////a/////note/////from/////the/////author/////////////

A.N.: Whewww…this took me forever, but here it is, my chickadees! Looking back, I think I put too many themes in here… and remember what I told you about Kikyo-hating holds up an angry piranha on a stick I named him "Chompy" and he's very personable, if you know what I mean. Oh, and I don't own Inuyasha, or any related characters. There, I admitted it. 3

**A Few Notes on the Text: I made Kikyo into a nun, well because it's like a modern day equivalent of a miko and also 'changes' was the theme I wanted to deal with in this story, so I changed Kikyo over time. I may just go back and cover some of those past events Kikyo had gone through, but I'm creatively exhausted right now, soooooo…only a maybe. And I'm not making Kikyo out to be a bad nun, actually she was quite exemplary in her convent, but I wanted to stress the fact that Naraku has a way of bringing out the worst in our dear Kikyo. Meh…maybe I should outline more…nahhhh…I kinda like the way the climax turned out, but meh….I should just stick to writing literally instead of all this symbolic stuff…oh, and the last theme was 'are we truly free?' I just think the whole Kikyo/Naraku situation is riddled with the fact that they're both being manipulated by the good and evil sides of the Jewel, you know with Kikyo absorbing Midoriko's soul and Naraku birthing his newest incarnation due to the influence of the Jewel (it was quite unintentional, too)…you know…that's just fishy right there…ku ku ku… (read the latest chapters, kiddos! But still buy the manga, or I'll devour your soul)**

Cactus: Damn…eight pages…need to get life…although it took me like 6 months to finish this…I just get sidetracked and stuff…

Yumie: Awww…but my lovely Kikyo-chan inspires you so much!

Cactus: Since when was she your Kikyo?

Yumie: blushes I'll never say!

Kikyo: Yumie-chan, behave yourself.

Yumie: glomps Kikyo Uwaaaah! Kikyo-chan!

Cactus: Down, you OC! And hey, this skit has extended it to nine pages! Huzzah!

_You're insignificant dust when compared to more significant dust…_


	3. Wishes Granted

AU; not connected with the other chapters

Wishes granted.

She smiled at him. A token of genuine affection, acknowledgement; a prize he had payed for with oceans of shed blood and anguished tears. No longer did he have to sustain himself on the vague memories of her practiced indifference staring down at him. Most of these precious recollections were simply echoed amalgams of past reality merged with the fevered imaginings of a dying man to begin with. His guarded fantasies and most secret of dreams were all but obsolete in the face of the _real thing. _At this moment, he knew for certain -just as he did fifty years ago- this was what he craved the most.

So when she smiled , it should have been a moment of supreme fulfilment, the realization of a thousand whispered yearnings, long denied, but never fully silenced.

Her legs shifted beneath the fabric of her simple dress as she glided toward him, arms raised, ready to embrace. He completes the action, savoring the touch he had purchased with his soul. Her gaze turned to him. He hesitated to match it. A caress of those hands - hands that could bring life and death, damnation and redemption with a single gesture - stole away his resolve

His illusion was shattered. Empty eyes, devoid of the pride, compassion, and determination that defined them once. No sign of the devotion he so desperately sought after. He almost prefered the hatred that once radiated out of them, pure and unfettered. He knew he could undo this, make things the way they had once been; he could try and do things the _real way_. However, his bargained existence had arisen from the desire to crush the bonds of others; he knew nothing of building relationships.

His heart was too weak, too frightened to face the gaping maw of loneliness he had once felt to go back to the status quo; to face each waking moment with the realization that he would never obtain her.

The Jewel was the only way he would ever have a chance of being with her. _In time you'll forget why her serene gaze tears at your petty human heart _a voice purred from the his mind's abyss. _You'll forget that you had to kill her in all ways but one for her to touch you. _His grip on her tightened as he desperately tried to assure himself.

Darkness swirled in the depths of the Jewel, delightful pain, sorrow, and perennial denial. It knew, as did Naraku, the greatest despair was that of a wish granted.

A/N: oh wow, I still exist.


End file.
